It's impossible to age as a woman and here's all the proof you'll ever need

What the Millie Bobby Brown and Pamela Anderson crossover reveals about anti-aging, shame, and insane double-standards

Hiiiii — It’s Micah from Modern Hysteria, your newsletter and podcast revealing the taboos of women’s brains and bodies. Listen on Spotify, Substack, or Apple Podcasts. 🙃

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It is impossible to age correctly as a woman in the public eye. The current Pamela Anderson x Millie Bobby Brown overlap is all the proof you’ll ever need.

You may know British actor Millie Bobby Brown as “Eleven” from Stranger Things.

Brown was only 11 when she was cast as Eleven in 2016. Now, she’s 21, married, in a new movie with Chris Pratt called The Electric State, and being crucified by fans who say she’s aged herself.

For a woman in the public eye, aging is an unforgivable sin.

Brown’s crimes include (but are not limited to): Having nasolabial folds, getting Botox, dying her hair the wrong color blond, and having a subpar makeup artist? …

Anywayyyyyy ….

Brown wanted authentic “vintage” 90s pieces for the press tour as a nod to the film The Electric State, which is set in the 1990s.

Who better to borrow from than 90s Baywatch bombshell Pamela Anderson? In a very chic and iconic move, Anderson lent Brown some of her personal pieces for the tour, including a pair of pants that “fit like a glove.”

Here’s the irony of this pop culture moment:

Both Anderson and Brown are in the public crosshairs at the moment:

• Brown for aging “unnaturally”

• Anderson for aging “naturally”

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Anderson, 57, violated a celeb norm when she showed up to an Isabel Marant show at Paris Fashion Week 2023 without makeup. She said she didn’t want her makeup to compete with the clothes, but has also acknowledged that her decision to go makeup-free was also prompted by the death of her longtime makeup artist in 2019.

Penciled-on eyebrows and contrasting lipliner was big when Anderson starred in Baywatch in the 1990s, and her makeup look was nearly as iconic as her red swimsuit (which is SO iconic it’s on display at The Design Museum in London this year). But, these days, Anderson doesn’t have a “glam squad” or a stylist, and says she’s “all about self-acceptance.”

Anderson’s character in her latest movie, The Last Showgirl, didn’t wear makeup either for the most part because Anderson wanted to be “raw and real.”

For Anderson, going without makeup is “a relief” and “freedom,” but also “rebellious.”

The fact that wearing your own face feels like a “rebellion” speaks volumes about what it’s like to be perceived like Pamela Anderson.

Celebrities — particularly women celebrities — are often treated like objects for our consumption. Their hair, skin, clothing, eyelashes, wrinkles, injections, and surgeries are fodder for our gossip and magazines.

When these women age they expose how our society regards them as products, not people. We don’t extend them the grace to have wrinkles or sun damage, cellulite, or gray roots. When they get crows’ feet and their boobs begin to meander south, they get called out for disrupting a fantasy.

The fantasy is that it is possible to “anti-age,” and that women owe it to society to break their backs trying to adhere to a narrow, unrealistic beauty standard (and to stop trying would be a betrayal).

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Millie Bobby Brown and Pamela Anderson are both being shamed for how they age — one for doing too much, the other for doing too little.

Let this be a reminder that the beauty standard forces us to some sort of specific, impossible middle ground between:

• trying and trying too hard

• not caring and caring too much

• being young but looking mature, and being mature and looking old

I feel like a pinball rocketing between these opposing forces right now. At 33, I’m postmenopausal and doing hormone replacement therapy. It’s a grueling slog through brittle bones and aching joints, but sometimes the most painful part is feeling like I UNO-skipped to thin skin and sagging.

So — I’m writing this is a reminder for me and for you:

The aging paradox is a fight we cannot win. It’s a double standard that reveals there IS NO CORRECT WAY TO AGE AS A WOMAN according to our beauty standard. Our internal struggles with aging are shaped by external, sexist expectations.

(Worth noting: Pamela Anderson’s public no-makeup debut coincided with her acquisition of the Sonsie skincare line 👀).

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Did this resonate with you? Tell me in the comments (I read every single one!)

And, ICYMI, here’s the latest episode of the Modern Hysteria podcast, where movement therapist and PRO-aging advocate Angi McClure reveals the best ways to exercise as we age:

Still to come on Season 1` of Modern Hysteria:

• Menopause x Misogyny x Body Image with

  Menopause & Misogyny

• Body Dysmorphia with physical therapist Laura Glazebrook

• Pregnancy Brain with therapist and author Parijat Deshpande

• Painful Sex with pelvic floor therapist Rachel Gelman

• Vulvas x Vaginas with gynecologist Carla Carpenter

• Pleasure x Orgasm with Cindy Sharkey

• Victoria’s Secret x The Beauty Standard with publicist Ashley Graham

Subscribe here to get new episodes sent directly to your inbox ⬆️ and listen on Spotify and Apple Podcasts.

Talk soon —

Micah

See more: A Well-Trained Wife by

Tia Levings